Desperate and heartbroken

[Feistyblues]

My dad brought my Rascal home last year in March. The very next day he brought home two more babies who didn't have their eyes open. At first I thought Rascal was too old to rescue, he looked so grown to me, but he was a itty-bitty thing. Just had his eye's open and ready for life. We lost one of the babies. But my Mom took over feeding the infant while I took over taking care of Rascal. He still needed milk also. We bonded and he was so my baby. He got along with everyone and my brother grew fond of them also. I was out of work with severe depression and spent every minute with Rascal. My mom got a big bird cage before I was able to, so I considered Rascal to be our "free" in the home squirrel. I took all the measures of keeping him safe. June 29th my big brother, my only sibling who lived on the property hung himself. We have surveillance camera's and I made the mistake of watching everything. I've been traumatized. I couldn't believe it without seeing it. So Rascal turned into the best therapy squirrel I could ask for. When I was screaming in tears from having a meltdown (which was daily) he would do something to make me smile. Thanksgiving day he felt the pain I was in and ran up to me when I got home to grab my lips and give me a kiss. He loved me as much as I loved him. The next week my cat opened the door and he was gone. My parent's watched the camera's and he ran around the backyard with the dog's and then took off further in the back yard. The next day my mom was shaking his pecans and he ran out of a pile of metal and attacked her bad over a pecan. She naturally slung him off. I set traps with all his favorite things. Called him day and night. It's two months later and I'm still crying my eyes out calling him. I have heard him cry a lot. I go running and then he gets silent. I swear he came to me last week, but ran off barking. Next thing I knew my dad way laying down on the other side of the woods talking to him. He thought he was hid, but we could both see him. As we closed in he went up and I had to run home to get ready for work. I had no time. I took this entire week off praying and crying to get him back with no hope. He would either cry or come out barking pissed off at me. I didn't and still don't understand why he runs from me. Now I've tried to stay still in one spot and wait. My parent's have given up, but I can't. I know he's not happy out there. Everything terrifies him. He got used to our animals and we completely domesticed him not knowing better with it being our first time. He would let me trim his toe nails. He always wanted to be with me. I feel so helpless. Is he going to come home? What am I doing wrong? I was hoping yall could help me. They eat better than we do. I finally got him his own huge birdcage before he ran out. He was allowed to be free when I was home, but I had to put him up everyday before leaving for work. I hated leaving him caged up. But now he is loose because of that. I had one this morning watch me from the tree. It would go behind it and peek out to watch me. Is that him? But he's just not ready to come home? He was only 8 months old when he got out. But he'll be a year old some time around March. I don't want to give up, but it makes me more depressed everyday I try and get nothing. My heart is just completely broken. Even though my cat and my dog's are my world, they couldn't make me laugh in the middle of my meltdowns like Rascal could. He kept me on my toes. I had to keep everything neat and clean to keep him out of trouble and now I just don't care about cleaning anything. What's the point? I envy my mom and her squirrel. Her female isn't friendly like Rascal was. She only loves my mom. We have a big area of woods, but it is limited. I kept hoping they'd run him off while breeding and once they started having babies. I would leave out his favorite crackers and pecans and someone was getting them, but I don't know if it was him. He was living in one of our buildings, but I'm not sure that he does anymore. Knowing he "came home" every night brought some comfort. I just don't know what to do. Do yall have any advice?

[stosh2010]

It's been a TOUGH year for you...I am so sorry for all your losses.
If Rascal has been "free" for 2 months... he has found a way to find food & shelter. He may "wild up" a little and not care to be held. Each squirrel is unique.
I released two brothers and one stayed distant and the other one--(Oscuro) --- came daily to be fed from a feeding station that we built on the front porch from a downed orange tree. He came each morning at 6, for 8 months and then was GONE... Gone Exploring, I keep telling myself.
I hope you can leave treats in the same spot for a few weeks and maybe he will respond.
Good Luck

P.S.
can you post some Rascal photos..???
or e-mail them to me---I'll post them for you.

stosh@jpcfl.com

[KarmaKay]

I'm sorry for your loss of your brother. I can relate. My brother committed suicide in 2009. It's very difficult. If I can be of any help let me know. As far as your squirrel...Unfortunately, he's not coming home because he's free in the trees. I had my first squirrel Larry and he decided on his own one day that he didn't want to be inside any longer. We didn't know any better and had been letting him go outside during the day and he'd come home in the evening. Then one day he didn't want to come back inside. As heartbreaking as it was, it was what was best for him. Hopefully you'll have another opportunity to help with more baby squirrels. Contact a local wildlife rehabber and ask if you can assist with squirrels. I'm sure they would be happy for an extra set of hands. Squirrels are meant to be free in the trees. His wanting to be outside was getting to him, and it's mating season which I'm sure played a part in the grand scheme of things. I pray that God eases your pain. Let me know if there's anything I can do for you.

Sincerely,
Karma

[Feistyblues]

I sent you a few pictures. We used to let them out when we first had them and Rascal was terrified. He froze at the top of a tree and my brother got him. My brother was a Steve Irwin and that was his idol. Another time he went out of my window and disappeared until bedtime and I found him in his nest in my bedroom. My window has stayed cracked since the day he got out. I emailed you some pictures. I know I thought when I first got him I would have to accept that I'd have to let him go, then by the way he acted I never thought he'd leave me.

[stosh2010]

I sent you a few pictures. .

I formed some of them into 2 collages..... plus your 3 pic...black and white one, that you made.

[Feistyblues]

Thank you! First time I met him in that middle black and white baby picture, he was in my brother's hands. That's my brother with him in the other pic.

[missPixy]

You are dealing with so much heart pain right now. It's very very possible your little boy may have a girlfriend, it's baby squirrel season now and that may explain his decision to not come back home. the boy and girl squirrels are getting together now and at his age, he's more than ready to join in with this. Given their sense of smell and hearing, it's possible they process much more information about what's going on in their immediate environment than we ever could.

I had a fall 2012 female gray rehab who I'd planned to release in spring 2013. Instead, she unexpectedly bolted out the door one January night, into the snow, despite my calling out for her and wandering around the dark yard for hours trying to find her.

Her determination to suddenly leave, I believe, was triggered by the fact that we have many other wilds who live in our neighborhood; when she ran out the door it was like she was heading someplace specific. It's like there was some other squirrel out there calling to her.

Although I thought I'd lost her forever, later that year, in the summer, she came back for nuts (we feed the wilds in our area) and to let me see she was doing okay. This reinforced my belief that she was taken in by another (most likely male) in the middle of a snowy New England winter. Otherwise I don't know how she'd survive, given that she was orphaned as an infant and had no way to build her own nest or locate food or resources.

It's the hardest part about loving these wild ones. Even when they seem so so tame, when they decide they want to be a wild, there's usually no turning back (unless they get injured and come back "home" to the person who raised them).

I hope Rascal comes back after baby squirrel season is over, at least to visit and let you see he's doing fine. He is such a beautiful boy in those photos, I can see how he stole your heart.

[Nancy in New York]

We also have another member sassysquirrel whose squirrel left for a year.
One day she went outside and just like that Sassy (squirrel) was back sitting on top of her release cage.
AND she knew her mamma when she went out to her. She stayed close just moved up a branch.
BUT she became friendly in no time. She was MIA for 13 months.
I will find the link and share it here.
Miracles DO happen, so don't give up hope.
Your picutres just tug at my heart.

Here's the link the Sassy's thread.
http://thesquirrelboard.com/forums/s...is-be-my-Sassy

[Feistyblues]

Thank you everyone! I said if I got him and he wanted back out, I wouldn't keep him hostage. Thank goodness our wooded area is pretty safe. They have a creek and plenty of food. I couldn't believe I found blue berries one day. Here in South Carolina is goes from 50 to 70 over and over. He hid for a long time. I didn't realize this wild cat was after him in the building. So many things I just wasn't thinking clearly about and could have had him. (my brother's death has made us all foggy thinkers) I was just out there and I have one or two who will just sit there and watch me. The other's don't give a crap about me. I know in my heart it's him sometimes. Before this week he would cry when I'd call him. I had some crying this evening, but I don't think it was him. I can tell the difference between the babies and the adult cries. Males all look like tiny babies up in the trees. I can tell a female by how big they are. I call Mom's Lola, Buddha. When she sits and eats she looks just like one. lol Lola escaped a week before my brother killed himself. She actually loved my brother. I had gone back to work. They watched the camera's and she followed him to his house beside us. Then the next week my brother died and the very next Wednesday our neighbor called us. Mom got her to come down enough to grab her and put her in her carrier. Lola wanted back out for a little while, but now she's completely over it. She came home with two bot flies in her and she let my mom get them out. Bleh horrible. I have a veterinary assistant certificate and can help people all day long with cat and dog advice (I wanted to go all the way, but I couldn't handle it), but squirrel's are so foreign to me. We were educating ourselves and both Lola and Rascal have it made in here. But I know it's not the same. My animals are my kids. I haven't lost one in years and I've never had one to just run away. It's just the timing and everything else going on. Every time I went to google something it lead me to this board. We didn't mean to make them pet's and I understand the controversy there, but our situation made it impossible not to make them our therapy squirrel's. Lola is finally coming up to me to sniff me and not bite me, but she won't let me pet her. She's kind of rough with mom and Rascal NEVER bit me. He would hold my pinky finger in his mouth while he was hollering because I was trimming his nails. I would be at work and mom talks on speaker phone so he would come running to her phone. I used to rescue cats and dogs like crazy, but we had a wildlife guy who was just a town away. He was great! But he had a heart attack a few years ago. I'm normally all work and no play. But I would love to rescue in the future. Now dad knows to just put them somewhere safe nearby and the mama will get her babies or another one will take it in. He was very sure Rascal's mom was poisoned and Lola and her sister were in a tree he had to take down. That's awesome that her squirrel came back after a year. I can't even imagine... this is killing me. Why me? is all I keep asking.

[Feistyblues]

Rascal on the left and Lola on the right