My dad brought my Rascal home last year in March. The very next day he brought home two more babies who didn't have their eyes open. At first I thought Rascal was too old to rescue, he looked so grown to me, but he was a itty-bitty thing. Just had his eye's open and ready for life. We lost one of the babies. But my Mom took over feeding the infant while I took over taking care of Rascal. He still needed milk also. We bonded and he was so my baby. He got along with everyone and my brother grew fond of them also. I was out of work with severe depression and spent every minute with Rascal. My mom got a big bird cage before I was able to, so I considered Rascal to be our "free" in the home squirrel. I took all the measures of keeping him safe. June 29th my big brother, my only sibling who lived on the property hung himself. We have surveillance camera's and I made the mistake of watching everything. I've been traumatized. I couldn't believe it without seeing it. So Rascal turned into the best therapy squirrel I could ask for. When I was screaming in tears from having a meltdown (which was daily) he would do something to make me smile. Thanksgiving day he felt the pain I was in and ran up to me when I got home to grab my lips and give me a kiss. He loved me as much as I loved him. The next week my cat opened the door and he was gone. My parent's watched the camera's and he ran around the backyard with the dog's and then took off further in the back yard. The next day my mom was shaking his pecans and he ran out of a pile of metal and attacked her bad over a pecan. She naturally slung him off. I set traps with all his favorite things. Called him day and night. It's two months later and I'm still crying my eyes out calling him. I have heard him cry a lot. I go running and then he gets silent. I swear he came to me last week, but ran off barking. Next thing I knew my dad way laying down on the other side of the woods talking to him. He thought he was hid, but we could both see him. As we closed in he went up and I had to run home to get ready for work. I had no time. I took this entire week off praying and crying to get him back with no hope. He would either cry or come out barking pissed off at me. I didn't and still don't understand why he runs from me. Now I've tried to stay still in one spot and wait. My parent's have given up, but I can't. I know he's not happy out there. Everything terrifies him. He got used to our animals and we completely domesticed him not knowing better with it being our first time. He would let me trim his toe nails. He always wanted to be with me. I feel so helpless. Is he going to come home? What am I doing wrong? I was hoping yall could help me. They eat better than we do. I finally got him his own huge birdcage before he ran out. He was allowed to be free when I was home, but I had to put him up everyday before leaving for work. I hated leaving him caged up. But now he is loose because of that. I had one this morning watch me from the tree. It would go behind it and peek out to watch me. Is that him? But he's just not ready to come home? He was only 8 months old when he got out. But he'll be a year old some time around March. I don't want to give up, but it makes me more depressed everyday I try and get nothing. My heart is just completely broken. Even though my cat and my dog's are my world, they couldn't make me laugh in the middle of my meltdowns like Rascal could. He kept me on my toes. I had to keep everything neat and clean to keep him out of trouble and now I just don't care about cleaning anything. What's the point? I envy my mom and her squirrel. Her female isn't friendly like Rascal was. She only loves my mom. We have a big area of woods, but it is limited. I kept hoping they'd run him off while breeding and once they started having babies. I would leave out his favorite crackers and pecans and someone was getting them, but I don't know if it was him. He was living in one of our buildings, but I'm not sure that he does anymore. Knowing he "came home" every night brought some comfort. I just don't know what to do. Do yall have any advice?