I am too sad for words.

[SquirrelPower]

I think my friend is gone, I think she died, I have not seen her for days. I'm pretty sure she wasn't feeling well, she was just sleeping all the time. the last time I saw her she was going down drainage pipes, trying to find a place to hide, in a watering bucket, etc. I didn't understand, til I thought about it later. They will hide when they are sick and then you can't find them to help them.

I feel so sick to my stomach, one day she was so healthy, happy full of joy, the next day, she just got sick, it happened so fast. I underestimated my attachment to her, i feel like I've been kicked in the gut. the night she went missing, I woke up at 2:30 am with a horrible sadness.

All I can say is the bond I had with her was something I would have never imagined. She would read my thoughts, and she always had such love and trust in her eyes, when I looked into them. She would lick my neck adoringly, almost motherly, when I fed her she would thank me with a lick on my hand.
I know there is no way all squirrels can be like she was, I still believe she was special. I am so grief stricken I feel like I can barely stand it, I went and ran, worked out, I just can't stop my tears from welling up.

I am wondering if giving her black walnuts may have made her sick. I gave her some, and she just loved them, loved chewing them up, but I read that they are poisonous to dogs and horses, after I gave her one, so I thought maybe they are not good for young squirrels. It just seemed like metabolic bone disease would not have come on in one day.

anyways, I feel like i've been kicked in the gut. I wish I had brought her inside, I saw how she was so full of joy, racing through the trees, I thought she would be happier outside, she always stayed close to the house, then one day I couldn't find her sleeping in her little house, she was gone. I never knew squirrels even smiled and frowned, that they loved to play pranks, that they kissed you, God I want to die.

I prayed about it and instantly a bible verse came to me, 'Whatever you bind on earth, ye shall bind in heaven.", notice is says 'whatever' not 'whoever', I think God specifically meant that to mean, your bond with animals. The body is a manifestation of the spirit, and it is true with animals, also.

I could hear her scampering across the roof, when I cried for her, I could hear her squeak a few times, but nothing was there.

Please pray for me and my squirrel. I hope to see her in heaven again. It was one of the purest friendships I've ever had with anything in this life, it was much too short. I wish I had never let her out of my sight now, I regret it so much, I was such a fool.

[UDoWhat]

I am so very sad for you. Are you sure she is gone?? I will pray for you and your darling squirrel. :Love_Icon :Love_Icon

Marty

[Milo's Mom]

Welcome to TSB. I am sorry it is under these terms that you found us.
I am sorry that I do not have advice for you. But what I can say is that she knew you loved her and she loved you right back. To truly love a squirrel is to give the squirrel the freedom to be a squirrel...outside, in the trees, versus in a cage for life. (unless of course the squirrel is a non-releasable)
"Better one day in the trees, than a lifetime in a cage." is in the signature of Island Rehabber and I think it speaks volumes.

I have a yard full of black walnut trees and my wilds eat them all the time, so unless the nut was bad I do not think that it was the black walnut.

Squirrels do smile...there's LOTS of pics on TSB of smiling squirrels.

I will say a prayer for you and your squirrel tonight.:Love_Icon

[stosh2010]

I think my friend is gone, I think she died, I have not seen her for days. .
Don't give up hope...some squirrels have returned after weeks and some even after months... I hope she comes back soon, so you can feel better again.
Can you post a photo ? What was her name. Was she a red ?

[pappy1264]

I released Bean in Sept. She stayed one day, then was gone for a week. Then the week of my birthday, she was there every day, all the way up to my actual birthday....then she was gone. Not a single sight of her. I was so sure she was dead (I have released other squirrels and they have moved on, but I never once felt one had died. It tore me up inside, I was sick and tortured by it.) I finally stopped looking, stopped calling, as it was too painful for me to do so and not see her at all. I was sure she had died, I felt it in my heart. Then exactly one month and two days since the last time I had seen her.....there she was. At first, I wasn't sure it was her and even when she came right up to me, I still thought 'it must be one of the others'. She had changed so much, her face was darker, her body so much bigger and lighter in color, but when she looked me right in the eyes, I knew, Bean was home.

I am not telling you this to make you sad. I hope your little friend is off exploring, making her home, gathering food. I pray she will come home so your heart can be released of the heavy burden you bear. I know it all too well.

My heart and prayers are with you.

[astra]

so many losses today...
... black walnuts are normally safe... you mentioned MBD?... yes, unfortunately, MBD can come on in one day, literally overnight...
... but as everyone said, she might still be back...
it's hard to lose a squirrel...
:grouphug :grouphug

[lorraine]

Don't be sad. She may not be sick at all. My little squirrel, after he was released stayed around my house for weeks. First he slept in his nesting box for a week or so and then he stopped coming in at night. He stayed around the house and came to eat back and forth all day and then would be gone all night. He never wanted to sleep in his box again.Then one day he just disappeared for about 10 days. I called and called, he didn't come. I was very sad too. You miss them so much that it's hard to believe. At first I thought something happened to him too because you never expect them to just not come home. I thought he was gone for good. But that's what alot of them do. I was heartsick too. A few days ago he just showed up again. He comes and eats and hangs out in the yard and the trees around the house but he would never come back in the house. Wait and see what happens. She might come back in a week or two, give her some time. Don't despair. They love their life up in the trees. Letting her go is the right thing to do. I also don't think black walnuts are bad for squirrel. They eat them all the time. Don't worry, she's around. Sooner or later you may hear her little feet on the roof again.

[Talzhemir]

I'm so sad for you, but, please, don't give up hope. Squirrels do often show up again.

A cup of walnuts has 280 mg calcium. It's a fairly high-calcium food. A cup of cooked spinach has 250 mg and a cup of cooked rice has only 20. Uncooked nuts like walnuts are rich in energy of an easily absorbed and highly storable sort. They're an epic source of Omega-3, which keeps a plump squirrel's own body fat from harming it. (Plump is good.)

That your little friend was sleeping very likely means she was healthy, comfortable, and had a liver fully loaded with calories in prep for the next few months.

It is possible the walnuts made her drowsy- but that's also supposed to happen. Squirrels have lived safely on black walnuts for many generations. If they eat enough of it, it makes them sleepy (like a huge Thanksgiving dinner does to humans). It's the juglone (the toxin in black walnuts) that does it. It slows down respiration.

That would mean brain damage or even death for humans and horses and dogs, but squirrels are set up to sleep days in a row (without even a sip of water all that time). When they go into deep sleep, body temperature drops, and heart beats very slowly. They're in Energy Saver mode.

When in this state, they seem unable to hear as much. It's as if the sensitivity of those sharp ears was turned way down. That makes sense. Waking up at every noise would be counter-productive. Even if you were really close by, she couldn't hear you because of that.


"...the last time I saw her she was going down drainage pipes...They will hide when they are sick..."

'Down' sounds like she was scouting for water. Is there perhaps a birdbath nearby?

For a place to hide, she would tend to go up. Squirrels may also may scamper off to build a drey, that ball of twigs and leaves in the notch of a tree.

Nest boxes are wonderful for raising a family but for sleeping through the winter, some squirrels also want a drey, so they can be really high up. Like on your roof.

:Love_Icon
I'll send good thoughts your way, and hers.
:Love_Icon

[petlover56]

Im so sorry for your loss..but just keep searching for her cuz you never know where these squirrels hide and they come out from the most unlikeliest places!!

All the best with your search and may she find peace wherever she is... :grouphug our prayers are always with you..

[Dan&Sofia]

I would think that any squirrel that is successfully living outside is best suited for surviving outside. Keep looking out for her; I am optimistic that she is fine, just off conducting squirrel business (what ever that is).